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Apr 29, 2007

Culture, Pets & PDAs

She didnt want him to waste time and told him to get to the point. The point of the Emergency meeting of the Highly Honourable members of the Executive Committee of the Residents Association, with the residents. "No Samosas" he grumbled. She glared and said I dont care.

"Regarding pets and PDAs" he summarised. She sighed in relief. Atleast it was not a rule about maids being paid less, to work in less homes. (For the curious, the rule remains unchanged, uncared and ignored).

Relieved and yet curious, she asked "What and Why".

He hesitated and then said "The president saw our neighbour hug and hmmm, express PDA, with his dog, yesterday and realised its against our culture and could be against the law too."
"You mean people shouldnt kiss and hug their pets in public?"He looked alarmed. And stared suspiciously at their child, who was watching TV. Since he didnt have the energy to argue with their child on leaving the room, he beckoned her to the bedroom.

"How could you say Kiss, in front our child" he asked annoyed. "Pleazzzzzzzzze the child, watches the news. Anyway, give me more details."

"Well yesterday our president came across an owner kissing his dog in public. And since thats not part our culture, the Executive Committee Members thought they will send out a strong message and protect our children from the cultural invasion. After all the children might see people kissing their pets and think why not kiss people too and their mind would become polluted."

"And are we allowed to watch movies? Do we have to lock our children away before watching TV" she asked..

"Thats our private decision as parents, but the Association has decided to be responsible and protect our cultural values".

She complained,
"Is it part of our culture to get continous media reports about kilos of henna used in a marriage, when 7000 Indians die Everyday from hunger?
Is it part of our culture to moan about endorsement deals of cricket stars while not caring, if an official gets Rs.3 crores as a bribe, for one deal?
Is it part of our culture to burn brides or kill the girl child before birth?
Is it part of culture to have the largest number of child labourers or have 5 lakh children enter the commercial sex trade Every year?
Is it part of our culture to have 47% of children below 5 years underweight or let 50% of the children without even primary education?
Is it part of our culture to eat biscuits & chips loaded with transfats and harm the God given body?
Is it part of our culture to dump this earth with plastic bags?
Is it part of our culture to zoom around in cars and then complain about extreme weather?

Is it part of our culture to complain about Valentine's Day and rush out to buy platinum on Akshaya Trithi?

Guess after no PDA, the only thing that is part of our culture, is making sure women dress up so that men's biological instinct is repressed. Biological urges! Humphf! Elephants, donkeys, birds, bees, and every other creature on this planet, seem unperturbed when their female counterparts are nude, whats so special about men.."


She paused to inhale.
"Why are you getting upset, when we dont have a pet.." He asked perplexed.
"Well I am just sick and tired of people defining culture for their own convenience. I am going to vote against this President in the next election."

He smiled and said, "Well many of us feel the same.."
She looked amazed and said "And I thought, part of the culture, was to never question or care!"
"Of course we care! They collect a ransom for maintainence and dont give us anything to eat. We are going to vote en masse against this group, unless.." he paused, thought and then added, "the President manages to get some TV coverage on us being a Culture Conscious Complex."

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