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Dec 24, 2011

Life Lessons for my Kid

Dear Kid,
While its your life, and you have to learn your own lessons, thought I could make it easier for you by sharing some lessons I have learned.


1.Life is not Fair
Instead of wasting your time thinking in terms of "but" this should not have happened, think "and" this has happened, what can I do now.

2.God Exists
Its tough to accept the concept life is not fair, with the existence of God. But just think of God as a Single Working Mom, who cares for her children but doesn't have the time and energy to do everything the children want or need. (When you are really mad at God, just think God is busy keeping some galaxies from colliding with each other).

3.Bad things can happen to Good people
The point of goodness is not to prevent "bad" things from happening to you. Goodness feels good, thats all.

4.Don't Laugh At Anyone.
This is perhaps more of my superstition, but just trust me. Think, if Ram hadn't mocked Kaikeyi's maid, perhaps he wouldn't have been exiled. If the brothers had not mocked Surpanaka, Sita might not have been kidnapped. And if Draupadi hadn't laughed at Duryodhanan in the Palace of Illusions, perhaps the animosity wouldn't have increased. Why give "bad" people one more excuse to get back at you. (For the person who insults, its written in sand but for the receiver its etched in rock.)

5.People don't like to feel Guilty.
If you are going to make someone feel guilty, atleast provide them an excuse for their action. Otherwise they are just going to resent you. The temporary "holier than thou" high you will receive, is absolutely worthless. (This doesn't mean don't stand up for what you believe. Just don't make everything personal. (Focus on the behaviour and not on the person).

6.Trust but don't believe.
Trust intentions but don't believe everything people say. If your friend suggests you a scheme, trust the friend's intentions.But that shouldn't mean, you should believe in the suggested schemes.

7.People and You
Swat away the mosquitoes, gently sweep away the ants, be respectful of the bees, don't waste time chasing butterflies, ignore the spiders, and most importantly learn how to not get irritated with the flies. And don't be ashamed to scream, when you come across cockroaches. And if possible, corelate this with people. (A tip, the flies are the good people who behave badly). And be prepared for one category to transform into another. Just when you decide someone is an ant, they decide to become a fly.!!

8.Decide if you want to be Happy or Right.(thanks Dr.Phil). 
For many years I thought I couldn't be Happy if I wasn't accepted as Right. Well now I realise, being Right isn't the Only way to be Happy.

9.Satisfied but not Happy?
Its not your partner, friend or anyone's responsibility to make you happy. Learn to generate your own happiness.

10.Patience can be a part of "Aggression"
When it comes to in-laws, just remember Sunil Gavaskar's quote "Give the first hour to the bowlers because the next five hours will be yours."

11. Career Choices
If you have to choose between "doing what one wants to do" and "doing what one is good at", choose to do what you want to do. Even if you fail, you will at least have the satisfaction of having done, what You wanted to do. And if you are confused about what you want, just imagine things going awfully wrong with your choice. If you are still willing to accept responsibility for it, you will know its Your choice.(Btw only in theories, Bosses want you to be perfect. Make a small mistake once in a while, they would love to correct you and guide you and prove to you, they are your Boss for a reason).

You don't have to feel great to smile,
You don't need an excuse or reason to smile.
Yet if you feel you do, just smile for a few seconds at yourself,
You would realise you feel good.
And what better reason do you need?
Just to feel good, many abuse their bodies.
Why go for that, when you can achieve it with a simple smile.

Think of Smile as a Single Run
And a Laugh as a Six or Four.
You need not hit a Six or Four with every ball
Even singles count.
Be glad you are not out,
Instead of waiting for a stimulus to make you smile.
Stimulate yourself with a smile :)