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Jul 30, 2006

Lies or just Truth Disguised

Sick of asking Why,
why to me, did they Lie?
A short guide
to Liars and Lies

1.Convenience Liars.
They organise their memory selectively. They have a simple rule. They can never be wrong. Otherwise nice, and caring, they have a nasty habit of shifting their blame on you.
Example 1 : A coworker who gives you a bad suggestion, and when it backfires, clicks tongue and says "You should have listened to me, and avoided it".
Example 2 : Those who eat junk food frequently and say they dont know why they gained weight.

2.Reality Liars.
While the Convenience Liars, choose to forget whats undesirable, the Reality Liars, alter the reality, to their preferences.
Example : The colleague who tells the family, "I am the most important person at work".
Example 2 : The porn addict who thinks, "They enjoy it and think I am fantastic."
Example 3 : The smoker reading the Warning on the Label
Example 4 : Those who buy a product, which will help them lose weight, even when they eat whatever they want and never exercise.
Example 5 : The persons who decides the school syllabus.

3.Deliberate Liars
They know they are lying. But dont care about it.
Example 1 : Your Boss, talking to the SuperBoss, about you.
Example 2 : Most of the Politicians.

4.Spice it up Liars
They know they are lying, but just garnish or exaggerate, and think its fun and not harmful.
Example : The neighbour who says I honeymooned in Honolulu, when it had been Goa.

5.Technical Liars
They dont tell the truth and fudge few facts.
Example : The advertisement which claims Biscuit is better than milk, never mind the sugar, and the hydrogenated oil, which the body cant digest.

6.Mumbo Jumbo Liars
They mention a few words in a foreign language or a new term, and have you believe, they have said something superior.
Example 1 : A products which has g3 technology.
Example 2 : The doctor who has a tie up with a lab and asks you to take a few tests to test #$#@@#23
Example 3 : Those who pretend to know God personally.
Example 4 : A person who uses this post as a basis for Socio Intellectual Analysis of Human Response in Varied Conditional Situations, subjected to Emotional Alterations, due to Suppressed Multi Stimulative Reasons.

7.Feel Good Liars
They dont tell the truth, but will talk about a small fact, as if it was the whole truth. But they do it because, it makes us feel good, so dont blame them.
Example : The media, which will not talk about a woman dying Every 5 minutes in India due to childbirth, unless, a celebrity decides to talk about it. If that happens, they will talk about the celebrity's latest movie/album/book for 20 minutes and about the issue in a 20 second line.

8.You are so Lucky Liars
When you are convinced that you are lucky and you have a wonderful opportunity, which is exclusive to you in Billion years, amongst Billion people.
Example 1 : Your friend who has joined a multilevel marketing network.
Example 2 : The email you receive from an ex-African leader, who has millions in a bank account.

9.Occupational Liars
They ask you to never worry. And all you have to do is to agree to their suggestion, and do as they say. And they promise to protect you from the big bad wolves.
Example 1 : The agent who asks you to just sign the credit card application, and not bother with filling the details or reading the fine print.
Example 2 : The hardworking people who happen to send spams.

11.Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig Truth Liars
Those who make a the truth so long and boring that you waive your right to know it.
Example : The software manufacturers who write The End User Agreements for you to Accept.

12.I Love You Liars
They will proclaim their almost unconditional love to you.
Example : The parent who doesnt care if the child has cheated during exams, as long as, the marks are above, that of the child next door.

13.I Dont Want to be Weird Liars
They will never mention their quirks or their values or any truth about themselves, because they dont want to go against the "society".
Example 1 : The person who has a good intution but keeps quiet about it.
Example 2 : The guy who laughs at a sexist joke, even though he hates it.
Example 3 : People who have to still be in the Closet.

14.Statistics Liars
They will never believe any statistic, unless they want to. And still will use statistics to convey what they want.
Example 1 : The person who will say "There are 3 types of the lies, lies, damned lies and statistics", or "Statistics is like a bikini, it conceals the vital .." when I say 24000 people die Everyday from Hunger.
Example 2 : The people (women) who say, men should be castrated because, most of the rapists are men, and civilisation can go forward through artificial insemination, and thats the best solution to combat rape. And since most men have female relatives, they will agree to it. They forget that, just because most of the rapists are men doesnt mean most of the men are rapists.

15.Effect Liars
They are good intentioned souls, who alter the facts, to tell you the truth.
Example : The spouse who says its a migrane, when its a headache, to get from you the response to headache.

So many excuses and reasons for lies,
Exists everywhere, even though its despised.

Blog Post no. 319 Other Posts in Hmmm series


  1. " A person who uses this post as a basis for Socio Intellectual Analysis of Human Response in Varied Conditional Situations, subjected to Emotional Alterations, due to Suppressed Multi Stimulative Reasons." what does this mumbo-jumbo mean????

    its sure a handy guide to liars...though you missed those liars who leave their knives in your back...

  2. Now I learnt how to avoid getting caugt lying. That was a good post... and I'm not lying! :)

  3. happy birthday Gaya.

    have a great year ahead.

    sorry, in a rush, so not cmted on post.

    hope you had a great day.

    mailed you, dunno if it reached you though.

  4. lollllzzz....fabulous!!! made my day:)

  5. @$#!$# well i think that mumbo jumbo would mean nothing even its meant to sound profound :D
    well they come under the deliberate liars categ :D

    vaibhav ha ha,
    btw nice to have u here:)

    ramses thank you:)

    on trial thanks:)

  6. :)) Prior to today i have olny heard of "colored" lies . this 1 is a nice new categorization of Lies...interesting . n quite true(!!!) too :)
    btw , when a company says the product has g3 tech , actually it do has it .. but it may not be of any real addition of quality 2 material.. hmmmmm ,so which type of lie wld it be

  7. well i think the company would be aware that the effect would result in a lie even if its technically right..and since it uses technical words, i thought mumbo jumbo lies.. strider:)

  8. Hi liked reading your blog thanks for sharing.Wish you well

  9. Good list, but you missed those "lies of omission". When the intent is to deceive, the omission of a critical fact is the exact same thing as a lie.

  10. disengaging, yeah that shouldnt have been omitted..
    in fact thats one of the best lies told..
    like the 24 7 news channel who make a big deal of silly things and dont mention what has to be really told..
    thats really stupid of me, thanks for pointing it out..


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