Dear Diary
I wish I could discuss my body without being ashamed
I wish I could discuss my mind without being labelled a weirdo
I wish I could talk and understand
what I am feeling and why I am feeling
Whats the point in knowing about cultures and civilisation
About lands and inventions and formulas
When I ignore my mind and my body.
Why should I be made to feel ashamed of my private parts
Why should I be made to ignore my feelings and thoughts
When I hurt my finger, I know first aid
But when I feel hurt and alone, I feel ashamed to ask for aid
How will I ever know, if what I think and feel is normal
When sex education and psychology are not, subjects normal.
Whats the point of MY life, I want to think and ask
But let me get on with my algebra, otherwise I will be taken to task
A 13 year old girl
Hi! Finally got to your blog!
ReplyDeleteFirst thing, the disclaimer in your blog's header does not apply to me. Partly 'cuz I'm unemployed, but even otherwise! :)
About your this post, I realize, when I was 13, I used to be more open. Not with my parents, but with friends. Not exactly about private parts, about which I felt I could gain sufficient knowledge from textbooks itself! But about my feelings and innermost doubts regarding purpose of life, ideals, morality, etc.
But paradoxically, now I've become lot more closed. There's a lot of 'me' that you get to see on my blog. But still, it's not everything. And most important, blog is still my virtual life. In my real life, because of many incidents, I've very much distanced myself from others. Maybe, I've made the criteria to like and trust people very stringent. I don't easily share my emotions and ideas. I've started thinking of them as precious. Just like you wouldn't want your most precious things to be handled by someone with dirty hands, I wouldn't want the knowledge about my feelings to enter an unworthy mind.
I think you'd like this blog, but it would be best to start reading the posts from oldest ones:
Anonymous Life (click) by Sioneve.
And your point of what our (Indian?) education system and parental attitude do to us was not lost on me. :) I consider myself a victim, too.
Take care.
well i know a woman who was 25 well educated and 8 months pregnant when she accidentally found out from a novel, the way babies come out..
ReplyDelete(earlier she had assumed the belly would split open:) )
i was thinking of her when i wrote the post..
you can start with my favourites label..
I remember my mom being very embarassed when I asked about "stuff" :-D. I keep telling myself that I won't be like that, will try to be more open with my children. But you never know how things turn out, right?
ReplyDeletei think in this internet age, we can just send them the links :) (of course they might have googled out the info b4 we send it to them)
ReplyDeletei think i would be embarassed too..