Even though I have a happy marriage, I am a staunch supporter of those who want to remain single. And by single I dont mean live in relationships, but just feeling complete even if one doesnt have relationships.
As I said earlier, relationships are more like bungee jumping , not for everyone , though it can have its unmatched moments of thrills.
And staying single is still not easy these days. And I am not talking about the Child Marriage practice which exists almost everywhere in India.
Its not just parents colleagues neighbours and the milkman/woman. Its impossible to maintain an inbox without receiving an email about the various girls/guys who are waiting just for you, and who would, with a flash of magic, make your now miserable life heavenly.
And if its not marriage its dating. In any and every website.
So in face of this social pressure, how does one convince oneself to stay single when one Wants to stay Single. Well some gender neutral thoughts on the advantages of staying single.
1.You dont have to worry about making the right choice.
2.You wont have to worry about being dumped.
3.You dont have the illusion of not being single. After all many relationships do break. Before or after marriage.
4.You dont have to share the Computer, TV, Bathroom, Money and well everything else. Otherwise its only the mobile which you dont have to share.Worse you could end up with a mate who prefers the most irritating ringtone. (You may avoid the terrible TV programs with 2 TVs and terrible movies with strictly single viewing decision and terrible music taste with headphones or earplugs, but ringtones!!)
5.Perhaps you dont have to put up with inlaws who are always suspicious of you
6.Perhaps you dont have to be euphoric and look enthusiastic with your mate and then discover your mate is cheating on you with your "best" friend or a murderer or a golddigger or a maniac. They flash warning signs on mutual funds ads but unfortunately not on dating and matrimonial ads.
7.You dont have to remember more birthdays and valentine days and worry over gifts for your mate. And on birthdays, who knows better than you, what you like. Just buy one present for yourself.
8.You can travel anywhere without taking into account any other preferences. And if you forget to switch off the lights, no one would smirk at you and berate you for being irresponsible.
9.You can have a career or decide to not have a career without worrying what it would also mean for the family.
10. Perhaps you can be more responsible and learn to take care of yourself, instead of believing someone will care for you forever only to be shattered later.
11.You dont have to worry about the mate's moods, preferences etc or read books on the right method to tell your mate about body odour
12.Perhaps , you can read this blog at home, without your mate looking over your shoulder wondering if you are having an online affair. Or you may not have to worry about your mate having an affair while you are blogging.
At worst people will wonder if you are homosexual or have a "broken heart" or or if you havent started using the right fairness cream.
If you give some of these reasons you will be accused of being selfish. But whats the point of life if you cant live the life the way you want to.
Your parents will ask for someone to look after you/ after them etc. But then just point out your mate could be like someone unpleasant from their favourite soap.
Your friends might trying fixing you on blind dates. Well if you dont want it, just dump them or send this blog post link to them till they get the message.
Sure you could end up as virgins, but then marriage or any other kind of relationships arent guarantee for great sex either. And anyway you wouldnt also have to worry about unwanted pregnancies or HIV from oral sex (Medium HIV risk) or french kissing (Now who checks the partners mouth with a torch to check for open wounds in the mouth??) And you dont have to worry about the other sexually transmitted diseases. Anyway dont confuse relationship with sex. One could always find like minded sensible persons, who want you for your body and not your mind, money, soul etc and will not be hypocritical about it.
And last but not the least you wont have someone to blame for your mistakes.
And a person to sign forms when you are hospitalised..But then whats the point of life you cant live it the way you want to live?
Orphans survive, and if you want to, so can you in this society without entering into relationships for the sake of it.
So if you want to; decide you want to stay,
single and enjoy life on your terms everyday.
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maximus...just thoughts..posted on impulse..
ReplyDeletewell if you want to break the monotony and get married.
what if marriage life after 3-5 years becomes monotonous..
in the earlier days there was no illusion of control and freedom
Nice blog with good information on articles.
ReplyDeleteThank you for providing relevant information. I’ll keep visiting it for updated information.
Keep it up
pradeep:)
ReplyDeleteTriplex Hi :) Birthdays coming up:)
Well i am still in chennai and i keep postponin my trip perhaps i will return in april 2nd week :)
yeah i agree its a case of grass is greener. i am not saying that all should stay single, just those who want to stay single are not weirdos:D
HI BOSS:
ReplyDeleteBelow is the link for a protest meet for 03 bloggers in Delhi. Please advise asap.
http://o3.indiatimes.com/skjdesk/archive/2006/02/28/507717.aspx
cheers..skj
Maximus well i cant always come up with good points:D
ReplyDeletebut yes the point is, do what you want, its your life. who cares if it doesnt have a good reason, as long as it doesnt hurt others, and as long as you want it, that should be enough to make the decision.
its pointless to do something just for the sake of doing it and to "appear normal".
well monotony is better than bruises of a bad relationship, especially a bad relationship which you took on not for you own sake.
if we dont have our heart in it, it might not work and its tougher to bear the consequences..
skj said...
skj will check tommorrow :)
TripleX said...
TripleX Belated Birthday Wish:)
on o3 :D
on weirdos who are single, well atleast they dont impose themselves on others thru a relationship:D
Marriage: Part 1
ReplyDeleteTypical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and
I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on
table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand
that there will be sex here at 7 o'clock every night ... whether you're here or not."
(DAMN, SHE'S GOOD!)
******************************
Marriage: Part II
Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th
wedding anniversary!
The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone
that reads: "Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever"
"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone
that reads: "Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last"
(HE ASKED FOR IT!)
******************************
Marriage: Part III
Husband and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table.
Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed
either," and storms out of the house.
After some time, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make
amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting a second opinion!"
(YEP, HE HAD THAT ONE COMING, TOO!)
Marriage: Part IV
A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He
is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of
Six" in spite of her objections.
One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well.
He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home, 'Mother of
Six’?”
His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."
(RIGHT ON, LADY!)
******************************
Marriage: Part V
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were
giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5 a.m. for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5 a.m." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 8 a.m. and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5 a.m. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
**************************************
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a
rough draft before the masterpiece.
i'd prefer singledom too:)..and now got all the reasons rt here:)
ReplyDeleteannon:)
ReplyDeleteramses yeah!! :)
Liked the post... I see no harm in staying single either!
ReplyDeleteshreyans had forgotten the post! read it again, and enjoyed it:)
ReplyDelete