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Aug 20, 2007

Aargh Diaries - Wives aren't Women

On my way to the pantry, stopped near a female colleague, who had been talking a lot, about how she gives her son everything he wants, blah, blah, blah..

"Why do you want to ruin your son's life by giving him everything he wants instead of everything he needs. Now he is going to think its the duty of every woman in his life to take care of him and agree with him. And what kind of relation would he have with his wife; who wont live upto your standards in his eyes? And if she has a boy, she is probably going to express her resentment by giving your grandson everything he wants and getting the male approval from him, continuing the cycle.."

and hurried away before she could throw a heavy file at me, into the pantry to hear Mr.C say "Well, wives aren't women".

Since motherhood was on my mind, couldn't resist asking "So Mr.C, your mother wasn't a woman or wasn't a wife?"

Logically legitamate but socially, it makes you feel as if, you are working in a freezer, in the Artic, before global warming era.

I dont understand why women have to be idolised in one relationship
and demonised in another relationship
Whats the big deal about women
Why not just treat her as human.

Hmmm, atleast I have achieved equality at work
The men and women hate me, equally.

A kind colleague whispered, "How can you abuse mother, don't you realise its against our culture.."

A married mother isn't a natural guardian or atleast a co-guardian of her child, and a divorced woman had to go to Supreme Court because the RBI would let her open a fixed deposit in her child's name..

And we have women dying every 5 minutes in our Mother Worshipping Nation, due to childbirth and
a mother in Sri Lanka, Bangladesh or Pakistan has a better chance of survival than the Indian mother. But losing to them on Maternal Mortality Rate isn't as important as losing our men's cricket team, losing to their cricket team.

Please! We care more for Munnabhai, than the Indian mothers.

Well I dont enjoy working in a freezer, so nodded quietly, with apparent remorse to the colleague's comment.

PS : Thankfully Munnabhai's bail plea has been granted, and the office is busy discussing him, bailing me out of my, "Mother Mess".

Aargh Diaries is a fictional series and Aargh is an Anonymous, Annoyed, Reasonably, Good Human.


  1. I agree with having the same issue where hubby dear who was pampered under the name of motherly love.

    Tried saying it & heard that its against the nature of Indian woman and blah blah :P

    I sometimes think women are the worst enemies of women. Rather than going forward and bringing good changes, we are going backward under the name of sacrifice and love.

    - Vrinda

  2. vrinda exactly, though men have to take the blame too.

    deny women her rightful resources, she has no option but to side with the men who have the resources

  3. hehe that was funny... equality - both men and women hate me.. lol

    ok now donkey, today the markets were crashing and i was not in the mood to work and i chanced upon one of yr old blogs.. the one that talked about o3 (whatever that was) and had a lot of tags... anyways it was real fun. and nice to know someone is content making up stories as a hobby... hehe... thats cool
    and i last read the story about the widow who wants to act against the corruption at her work place..
    questions:- 1. did that have a sequel? 2. was that autobiographical?
    comments:- that part where the widow takes her daughters history book and sees th freedom fighters appealed to me..
    ok, being so depressed by the way all our constitutional freedoms are misused to personal advantages and pollitical ends, i was thinking what we can do about it.
    But the truth remains that even with so much of injustice, our lives are kind of cosy and comfy so we dont really suffer because of it personally.. there follows that, there is no big reason for us to be patriots...
    But our freedom fighters did not let that thought hinder them.. they fought. they suffered for someone a few generations away..
    I think what our country needs is an other freedom struggle. where we, educated youth, collectively stop pretending that things can only be the way it is now, and start doing something about it.
    If some men of vision could free the country from the formidable British empire, then freeing our posterity from the clutches of corruption and irresponsible polliticains should not be a big deal.
    yeah, the cost is a lot of sacrifices... maybe a life time of effort, which could have been dedicated to making money, spent for the common good... but without that sacrifice, individual efforts, or emotional speeches are not gonna make one ounce of change

  4. Thumbs Up!! Very well said..

  5. O3 is another blogsite, (timesofindia) and well i have more comments there, and even the Wives arent women is a reaction to one of the lines by a blogger in o3:)

    I think you refer to the Conqueror's Crown. Before blogging I was a writer for and I had to bring out laws through short stories.
    The story is fictional, but the principles aren't. And there wasnt a sequel.

    I think we can make a difference even in our cosy life. Our freedom was won not due to the leaders but due to the millions who believed sacrificing their life and lifestyle would be worth the cause.
    I always belive we can make a difference, even if its not big, by standing firm on our convictions, and helping people in whatever means possible. That on its own would inspire others to do it.
    I dont believe in telling people what to do, so i leave the decisions, to them.
    but for starters, check sites like or or just the making the difference section in outlook magazine. we get to know the real issues Indians face and how people are dealing with it.
    you can also click once a day (7000 Indians die EVERYDAY from Hunger)

    markets seems to be going down today too:)


Have a Great Day!